confession

Confession: Right now I should be cleaning our house. You, my little love, are asleep – opportunity knocks and cloudy windows are calling my name. However, in my defense, you fell asleep in my arms. Instead of putting you down, I continued to sit criss-cross legged holding you. You make the most adorable faces when you sleep. The analytical part of me said to put you down but my heart urged me to enjoy the moment in time … and the winner was: MY HEART! Yay!!!!!!!!!!! It was a wonderful decision as you can bring me immense joy even when you are in dreamland. I finally put you down on the bed next to me. I promise I will clean the house but right now I just want to jot down some of the infinite number of things that I love about you…………

1. I love your bright eyes. It should be noted that you entered the world this way … literally. Your daddy said you were looking around even before you were completely delivered. When the nurse placed you in my arms in your baby-burrito swaddle, you gazed right at me nonstop. It touched me because it was clear that you knew exactly who I was. I knew that even though we were physically separated that we would always have a connection. I digress… Anyway, the nurses nick-named you “Bright Eyes” because you were so alert all of the time. You continue to look at everything with sheer amazement. I think the world would be a better place if we all gave things our full attention like you do.

2. I love how you smile in your sleep. Many people say that infant smiles are nothing but a response to gas. Baby Sprout, I refuse to believe that. Your little grin is one of complete joy and bliss. In the Bible, it talks about how God knits babies together in their mothers’ wombs. When I was pregnant I would think about this verse and it brought me great comfort to know that you were so close to God. Because of this, I can’t help but think that when you smile in your sleep you are somehow connecting with your loving creator.

3. I love your “turtle face.” When you want to eat, you purse your lips together (like you are about to blow a kiss) and stretch out your neck. Daddy says you look like a little turtle when you do this – you really do! It is so cute and it is one of things that make you uniquely you!

4. I love that you give your mommy kisses. I admit that sometimes I have to kiss you right on your little lips. You are so cute and I cannot help myself! Therefore, I blame it all on you and your adorableness. In response you make a little clicking noise and you give me your own little kiss right back.

5. I love your voice. You make the cutest little sounds I have ever heard. Sometimes you gently coo like a dove. Your favorite words are “gaaa” and “arg.” Then there are other times when you talk as loud as you can. Sometimes you’ll even startle yourself! Your favorite loud word is “aweaweaweawe” (4 syllables). When you talk to someone, your face is so expressive. You know exactly what you are saying. Also, when it is your turn to listen you show your intense interest with your highly mobile eyebrows and forehead.

6. I love your smile! Man, do I love your smile! Your daddy and I will talk to you and then all of the sudden you give us this fantastic toothless grin. Your entire face lights up. All at once you cause us to change our conversation with you to one that is characterized by high-pitched baby language. We can’t help ourselves!

7. I love the joy you bring. Even though you are still a newborn, you have brought so much happiness to so many people. Somehow holding you makes the day just a bit brighter.

8. I love YOU! I love every single thing about you! You are a wonderful creation and we are thankful for you being just the way you are. J

Okay, now to do the laundry…………..

Hold Your Head Up High

Dear Sprout,

You are almost two months old now! You amaze me with all of the new things that you can do. Your little pursed lips can break into a bigger-than-life grin, you are now fluent in baby language, and you can hold your little head up for an extended period of time. I can’t believe that I am folding up and storing tiny clothes that you have outgrown already. My “little sunshine” is growing faster that I would have ever imagined.

I love sitting you up on my lap and watching you hold up your little head with a perplexed look of accomplishment on your itty-bitty face. I imagine that you are thinking, “I am a big man. I can hold up my head just like daddy. Me and him are like two peas in a pod.” Afterwards, I place your tummy against my chest and enjoy holding you in my arms. You continue to hold up your head as long as you can. Whenever the need arises, you rest your little head against my cheek. Bliss.

I once was with your daddy when he had to have a difficult discussion with someone else. Sadly, the person that he was talking to said a lot bad things using bad words. Many men would have responded to such a situation by acting just like the antagonist. However, your daddy did not. He said everything that he needed to say in a very gentlemanly manner. I was very sad that your daddy had to be in that position to begin with – but I was so proud that he acted with dignity and integrity despite the circumstances. He held his head up high.

Sadly, when you get older you will have your feelings hurt. There will be people who disappoint you with their words and their actions. I am sure that there will be instances where you will want to respond in a similar fashion. You may even want to hurt, embarrass, and humiliate such people so they can know what it feels like. Do not. Clean aptly chosen words are far more powerful than impromptu obscenities. Acting in a self-respecting manner even when in difficult conditions will have more of an impact than you can ever imagine.

Right now you do not have to worry about such things. You are too little to understand unkind words. However, it is my prayer that Mommy and Daddy will teach you the correct way to respond by example. As you grow, we will help you as much as we can when you do not know what to do. We expect that when you are old enough to act on your own that you will keep your head held high. Never forget that you are to be a light in the world. God will give you direction and guidance … and mommy will have a cheek for you to lean your precious little head on whenever the need arises.

Love always,

Mommy