Don't Miss a Blessing

Yesterday afternoon, I started to not feel too well. In an attempt to rid myself of some mild pain and nausea, I put myself to bed. However, despite my attempts, I just could not get comfortable. This morning, I felt a bit better. However, as I was walking to the church building from the parking lot, my right leg started getting sharp pains. By the time I got to my pew, I was out of breath. As I sat among neatly dressed ladies, I could not help but feel "frumpy" in my too small maternity clothes and my old Keds. A pity party filled with such thoughts started to convene in my mind and as a result, my eyes started to get a little more moist than usual.

Since Sprout is due to be born this week, this might just be the last church Sunday for me for a little bit. Because of this, I asked Andrew if we could go to the church that I used to attend after our regular church service concluded. We do this from time to time, and I enjoy being a part of both services. He agreed and off we went to church number two.

At the beginning of our second service, the pastor asked a young deacon to pray. In the middle of his prayer, the deacon thanked God for children. He mentioned how he saw a dad walking his little boy to church and that the boy's curiostiy and enthusiasm touched his heart. As these words entered my ears, a strong conviction came over my heart. Why was I focusing on insignificant ailments when each little pang should be reminding me to be thanking God for my child?

I know that I am human and I know that I will become discouraged sometimes. I am aware of the fact that there will be times when I will think a little too much about myself. However, I also know that I need to catch myself when this happens. How sad it is that I could let self-consuming thoughts rob me from one of the biggest blessings in my life, even for just a few moments.

Lord, I would like to thank you for my baby boy. I know that he will be born very soon, and I would like to thank You for this special time where he abides in me. In some ways, my son and I are experiencing a closeness now that we will never have again. I thank you for allowing me to feel all of the little squirms, hiccups, and kicks. I thank You for blessing me with a time where I can take him everywhere with me. I thank you for a body that acts on behalf of a little baby that needs its protection. Lord, I ask your forgiveness for the times when I forget these things. Thank You, Father, for every single aspect of my pregnancy. You have blessed me beyond what I deserve.